We used to set the room ablaze with the passion we’d create.
A look or stolen glance led to stomach flutters and a thudding heart rate.
The first thought in the morning and the last before I’d go to sleep.
We used to chat for hours about our future and the promises we’d keep.
But that was so long ago, it seems like an eternity has passed since then.
Those memories fade away and the bad ones replay over and over again.
In my mind I visualize the fights, the yelling, the crying, and the tears.
Pushing each other’s buttons and visions of chaos throughout the years.
I was a convenient doormat, someone to drag down and ridicule.
Venomous words of hate you learned to yield as a useful tool.
Once independent and strong, forced to be subservient and weak.
Not allowed to stand up for myself, not allowed to feel or speak.
I remember the Sunday morning when I finally began to see.
It was like waking from a nightmare or having an epiphany.
The invisible chains that held me to you began to slowly wither away.
I discovered a part of me, deep down, that would no longer be your prey.
The first step was realizing you were never going to change.
Next was finding my inner strength and the will to rearrange.
New hobbies, new interests, new values, at any price or cost.
I could no longer sit idly by while my dreams and hopes were lost.
